“..gravest aspect they find themselves inserted in an unknown environment ..among hostile companions ..leaders whose characters they do not know. .. Man’s capacity to dig himself in ..create a shell ..a tenuous barrier of defence ..is astonishing and merits ..serious study. ..one manages to gain a certain equilibrium ..a degree of security ..a nest.” Primo Levi.
Levi, Primo. If This Is A Man. (1960)
I have always been a writer or at least I always wanted to write. My Mom was an astute and clever and wise Woman. I was in real trouble. Unable to process the grief over the personal loss of so many. An Aunt, Grandad, Dad and both Sister’s in the space of a few months. And I was still only a Child, ill equipped to understand it all.
“…silence grew oppressive SS officer had come in and ..with him ..odour if ..Angel of Death. ..A ..man ..with crime inscribed upon his brow and in ..pupils of his eyes. He looked us over as if we were a pack of leprous dogs hanging on to our lives.” Elie Wiesel.
Wiesel, Elie. Night. (1960)
But Mom gave me Books to read and distract my attention as I found solace in the works to escape with. Also, I carefully noted all those I had read, and still wished to find to read, in a little Red Notebook. Therein lay the first stirrings of a literary release. Years later, when I took up the courage to send in a manuscript of a novel, all my effort I honestly thought would produce, was merely a worthy read.
“..Traffic in ..Umschlagplatz was increasing. More and more columns of Jews ….rounded up from ..shop areas ..driven through ..gate in Gesia Street ..down Zamenhof ..to where they were loaded into ..cattle cars. ..Toward evening trucks began to line up in Niska Street ..loaded with ..contents of ..Werterfassung Waterhouse’s. ..Jews working on ..double ..prodded ..driven by SS. ..When ..last truck had gone ..two SS ..conducted ..working party to ..Umschlagplatz ..while ..remainder set fire to ..buildings. That night we were surrounded on all sides by burning buildings.” Alexander Donat.
Donat, Alexander. The Holocaust Kingdom. (1963)
Of course, too many Editors disagreed with my own assessment. There was a slight comeback though, and from one who sensed my need. From my less than fomented grief and perhaps my resolve, there was a chink of light. I was pointed toward the image of Tovah Olshak, a 4 year old Child.
“..Corpses were burned in huge incineration pits ..Old Crematory ..unequal to ..job ..speedy construction of four large gas chambers and crematories was ordered and on June 28th. 1943 ..Sturmbannfuhrer Bischoff ..chief of ..building section of .. Auschwitz Waffen SS reported that with ..last Crematory built ..camp had a daily capacity of 4,756 cremations. ..many more could be killed per day. Each of ..two larger gas chambers could accommodate 3,000 persons. ..human fat served as supplementary fuel. ..stench of burning flesh blanketed ..countryside for miles ..dark ..fatty smoke wafted across ..sky.” Bernd Naumann.
Neumann, Bernd. Auschwitz. (1966)
A Jewish girl, Tovah, who was already a Survivor, but for whom hate filled Poles would not let live, became my deep concern. With this sudden realisation, it was somewhat of a catalyst for me. It was also an input into my previous historical study. All of this, which proved cathartic in many ways, has given me an insight in human matters which disregards humanity.
“..question continues to oppress us ..how could a man with ..poor baggage of deranged ideas and prejudices become Chancellor of Germany. How was it possible that a state whose people and culture ranked high in ..worlds civilization should have entrusted it’s fate to this deluded man who believed ..he had been chosen to lead ..war against ..Jews. ..no single theory can ..explain Hitler’s ..success with ..German people. .. mesmerized ..they responded to his message. ..their moral sense ..with regard to ..Jews ..had become atrophied under ..effect of generations of virulent anti-Semitism. Had ..German people already become mithridatised by anti-Semitic poison ..so that they had become immune to Hitler’s deadly brand. Was it because he spoke for them.” Lucy S. Dawidowicz.
Dawidowicz, Lucy S. The War Against the Jews. (1973)
25 years later, and I add letters to words so as to string sentences together for all of 6,000,000 very and now personal reasons. I had begun my research, and studied and searched for about a further 4 years.
“..These Men ..Women ..seeing ..their fate ..shortly to be sealed ..began to make ..different preparations. No longer counting on ..mercy of ..Germans ..fought to survive in spite of them. ..A veritable underground ghetto sprang up in ..Warsaw sewer system. ..Jewish resistance gradually took shape. ..deportations continued ..only 40,000 Jews remained in ..ghetto at ..beginning of 1943. But now ..implacable SS were no longer ..only masters in ..ghetto ..another power had appeared ..Jewish Combat Organisation.” Leon Poliakov.
Poliakov, Leon. Harvest of Hate. (1979)
I read copious an amount of Books on The Holocaust theme. Contacted Survivors, Scholars, fellow historians. All the while I gathered an insatiable appetite for those words being relayed by those who knew what evidences I was searching for.
“..July 4th. 1941 ..restrictions ..decrees ..imposed upon ..Jews of Vilna. .. Simultaneously ..mass exterminations ..by Einsatsatzkommando 9 .. strengthened by Lithuanian units began. ..Wehrmacht ..assisted ..Einsatzgruppe .. extermination actions. ..Order stated ..in ..area of army operations ..SS ..assigned special missions pursuant to ..order of ..Fuhrer.” Yitzhak Arad.
Arad, Yitzhak. Ghetto in Flames. (1982)
There were those who were affected immediately by the Catastrophe. Then there were some like me, steadily adding to the incomprehensible nature of the hatred. This recurring theme of antisemitism, which so delivered 6,000,000 Jews into oblivion, wrenched at my very being. The longest of hatreds has proved a long reach and can ensure a non-Jewish response is essential.
“..commandant is annoyed. A young Jew had ..effrontery to run away. ..But ..a Jew ..may not run away. ..commandant is remorseless. As a reprisal ..scores of others ..sent on ..transport ..including quite a few who had thought they were firmly at anchor here. This system happens to believe in collective punishment. ..planes overhead couldn’t have helped ..commandants mood ..a subject in which he prefers to keep his own counsel.” Etty Hillesum.
Hillesum, Etty. Letters from Westerbork. (1983)
My Library is an exhaustive one, though hardly exhausted, as the requirement grew so has the need for more books has greatly expanded. So I have continually sought newer works to add to those I have recommended. For those writers best suited to our learning. I mention here, Alexander, Anne, Arad, Bernd, Elie, Etty, Leon, Lucy, Primo, Shmuel and Yisrael.
“..18th. May 1942. ..threat grows ever greater ..terror increases from day to day. I draw prayer round me like a dark protective wall ..withdraw inside it as one might into a convent cell and then step outside again ..calmer ..stronger ..more collected again. I can imagine times to come when I shall stay on my knees for days on end waiting until ..protective walls are strong enough to prevent my going to pieces altogether ..my being lost and utterly devastated.” Etty Hillesum.
Hillesum, Etty. A Diary 1941 – 1943. (1983)
These Books I have searched through, and all have offered me newer works to look through. My own Library’s content is for me to explore so as to lend to you all there is needed to know. I personally feel that these books are exceptional in the field of our search. I realised in those early days, there was an impassioned plea. The request went to the incongruous nature of the horror that I could all too readily envisage.
“..Jews who survived ..1942 deportations.. established armed organisations. ..resistance in ..event of ..liquidation. ..Serious armed resistance organizations ..set up in 5 major Ghetto ..Warsaw ..Wilno ..Bialystok, Cracow .. Czestochowa as well as ..45 other ghetto ..Breslaw ..Swieciany ..Lida ..Mir ..Stolpce ..Zdzieciol ..Grodno ..Nieswiecz ..Molczadz ..Kleck ..Baranowicze ..Slonim ..Dereczyn ..Krynki ..Lachwa ..Kobryn ..Brzesc ..Kamien-Koszyrski ..Poborsk ..Tuczyn ..Luck ..Zdolbunow ..Krzemieniec ..Brody ..Lwow ..Jaworow ..Brzezany ..Buczacz ..Borszczow ..Horodenka ..Rohatyn ..Miedzyrzec ..Podlaski ..Radzyn ..Zelechow ..Rzeszow ..Tarnow ..Bochnia ..Dzialoszyce ..Sandomierz ..Radom ..Pilica ..Bedzin ..Sosnowiec ..Opatow and Wlodawa. ..in ..extermination camps ..Sobibor ..Treblinka .. Auschwitz..concentration camps ..Plaszow ..Lwow-Janowska ..Jewish POW camp ..Lublin ..18 forced labour camps ..Kielce ..Skarzysko-Kamienna ..Ostriwiec ..Swietotkzryski ..Kruszyna ..Minsk ..Mazowiecki ..Budzyn ..Krasnik ..Sasow..Stryj ..Kamionka ..Hancewicze ..Koldyczewo ..Dworzec ..Swiezna ..Iwie ..Wilejka ..Kureniec and Biala-Waka.” Yisrael Gutman and Shmuel Krakowski.
Gutman, Yisrael. Unequal Victims. (with Shmuel Krakowski.) (1986)
Many of these works were established, even prior to the commencement of my research. One of these too was by Etty Hillesum. At first I couldn’t even finish her work, somehow stubbornly holding her back from the devastation that awaited and consumed her. I was well aware too that these 6,000,000 Jews were well short of an historical appreciation of their predicament. It is clear that the Jews instigated so many resistances, all contrary to many narratives and upon a wider scale than has been usually admitted to. My effort then is in ensuring All truth is truthfully given and in a more complete and rounded way.
“..Saturday 20th. June 1942 ..I want to write ..but more than that ..I want to bring out all kinds of things that lie buried deep in my heart. ..paper is more patient than man. ..there is no doubt ..paper is patient.” Anne Frank.
Frank, Anne. Diary of A Young Girl. (1995)
